Not Too Young: Feature with Dense Breasts Canada
My breast cancer story
After moving to Cambridge, I found a small lump in my breast, which I initially thought was a blocked duct from nursing my six-month-old daughter. Shortly after, I discovered another lump in my armpit.
After finding the lumps, I quickly scheduled an appointment with my family doctor and an ultrasound was booked that same day. When the ultrasound results came back with a BIRAD 5, we knew it simply wasn’t a blocked duct. The wait for a biopsy was a very long wait, and my doctor and I had to call a number of cancer centres and breast cancer clinics in order to be seen. Luckily my family doctor was extremely willing to advocate on my behalf.
When I was diagnosed, I was honestly a bit numb. I am an extremely logical person most of the time, so I somewhat went into control mode and just started making plans. As I went through the motions, I started to get little bits of breakthrough panic attacks at the idea of leaving my children, but with a great counsellor and a supportive family, it was manageable.
My treatment plan included 8 cycles of chemotherapy, a double mastectomy, 15 rounds of Herceptin, and 28 rounds of radiation. I finished all active treatment in February of this past year, and had my flat closure this February after a number of complications with my reconstruction.
I still have zero feeling in my chest where my surgeries were, and have some numbness on the side where my lymph nodes were removed. Otherwise, my biggest challenge was rebuilding my shoulder mobility after my mastectomy.
Emotionally, I have good days and bad days (doesn’t everyone). The support from my family, friends, and community helps me navigate the emotional toll, but I honestly try to move past it as much as possible and don’t let it control my life. I focus on small victories and cherish moments of joy to stay positive, I also use a ton of tools that I developed with help of a trauma counsellor. “The glass is always full if you’re looking at it from the bottom.”
Career wise, I was actually in what should have been the worst timing for diagnosis. I didn’t qualify for EI as I was self-employed, my partner was currently on paternity leave with our 7 month old daughter (while home with the other 2 older kids as well), and I was a month away from starting a new position with a great local company in the building supply industry. When I was initially diagnosed, I politely called my boss and told him I would no longer be able to accept the position due to my health. Instead of accepting my refusal, he suggested that I may still want to work a bit during treatment (on my good days) and built the position to be extremely flexible for my upcoming battle. I have had meetings during chemo rounds, and spent my mastectomy recovery doing professional development training from my bed. I’ve been there ever since, and I am extremely lucky to work for such a compassionate family-owned business.
I am pretty much back to myself, some days still bring challenges but for the most part, my life is even better than it was pre-cancer. I’m still learning how to dress this new body, but I know how dedicated my people are, know how much they love me, and ultimately, I know how much stronger I am than I thought I was.
The biggest thing for me was how easily my fiancé accepted the additional workload, parenting responsibilities and emotional labour of supporting us all. We have had soooo many crazy struggles in the past 5 years together, and through all of it he has been such a source of joy and laughter for our family. I swear our family had more fun during the few years of my cancer with him and our new baby, than we ever had before. It’s hard for me to look at my time battling breast cancer as “the hardest time in my life”, when it was also the most joyful.
Today, I am cautiously optimistic. I’m significantly more focused on my overall health rather than just aesthetics. I spend much more quality time with my family, and I’m finally learning about this whole work/life balance that seems absolutely critical to a happy life.
I’ve learned the importance of self-advocacy in healthcare, the strength I possess, and the profound impact of community support. I’ve also realized that my worth is not at all tied to my physical appearance.
I want other young women to know that their worth is intrinsic and not dependent on their circumstances. Early detection and self-advocacy is crucial, and they should never hesitate to seek help and support. Facing breast cancer is incredibly challenging, but knowing that you are strong enough to endure whatever those challenges may be is incredibly empowering.
